Grief, Friends, and You…Now What?
Thinking about life and the inevitability of loss whether that be a family member, friend, pet, or job, people will experience some form of grief with their loss. Grief is something that everyone will experience in their lifetime and dealing with it personally versus supporting someone who is experiencing it can look very different.
When our friends and family come to us with pain and sadness, we may not know what to do or say in those times. Although we want to be there for them in some way, we can get lost in understanding how to navigate it. We may even experience some form of discomfort because we feel awkward or uncomfortable with trying to reach out in some way.
So, how do you support those you care about who are experiencing grief, pain, and sadness? Here are a few helpful things you can do:
Check in
Call, facetime, or send text messages to let them know you are available to support them in some way and know they have someone there. If you know the person well enough, going to spend time with them in person and offering to sit and listen, watch a show with them, or offering a distraction can all be helpful.
Actively listen
Be present with them and take the time to attentively listen to what they need to say. When we take the time to actively listen, it means we are making a conscious effort to understand and hear what they are sharing. We ultimately want to validate their experience, and when we make the effort to listen, we are nurturing their pain.
Taking Action
Do things that they may need, whether that means buying them groceries, helping them around their home, or a variety of other useful tasks that can help alleviate their load. This can also look like spending time with them doing nothing or helping them with their kids.
Remembering Important Dates
Keep in my mind holidays, anniversaries, etc. When someone loses an important person in their life, these dates and moments can feel extremely difficult, so reaching out and spending time with them can make a huge difference. This could also mean sending photos, care packages, and cards as a way to connect them to those lost loved ones.
At the end of the day, letting your friend or family member know that you are there to support them is what matters, whether that means just sitting and listening, being in silence, or taking action. Yes, grief and pain can feel overwhelming and even awkward to face when someone else is going through it, but we can do so much for someone even if it's small.
Roubicek & Thacker Counseling is Fresno’s premier provider of individual, couples, family, and group therapy. We offer in-person and online remote therapy sessions. Contact us today to change the way you feel.