Develop Your Habit of Change
Time to make a new habit. Fantastic place to start for yourself and great small change can go the distance. The cool part is we have habits we do already. We are creatures of habit that stick to known routines. It’s amazing that consciously or unconsciously we do these small actions: drive, speak, think and eat. We are masters of routine. Making a new habit can be difficult to implement as we are already accustomed to our daily grind. You are likely to stick to an established routine rather than do an action outside of it. What can we do? For starters, we can agree we are creatures that can change and adapt.
The first portion of habit setting is having a clear goal. Doing this will make it easier to set and keep your habit of change in place. Consider the following example goals:
Healthier Eater
Work Out Consistently
Finding Time to Myself
Proper Amount of Sleep
Your goal should centralize on a single aspect you want to improve on. This aspect should be something achievable. You can’t expect yourself to have a goal of running a twenty five mile marathon next week if you have not done prior training beforehand. Setting yourself with realistic and achievable goals will help set your habit of change.
The second portion of defining the goal is asking yourself why it is important. We can cite all the “right reasons” to be healthier, to exercise, or to be “better.” List your personal reasons through writing or some form of note taking. Find reasons why you want to make these changes happen. It’s not to negatively challenge you, rather to remind yourself the importance of sticking with it. Outlining your personal values and reasons in following through your habit of change can help make it easier to integrate them into your routine.
The Habit Planning
With the goal in mind, it is now time to evaluate what can be implemented as a habit.
There are two questions to keep in mind when making a habit:
Is it realistic?
What are potential obstacles that can arise?
The first thing we need to consider is how realistic the habit is to you. Habits of change should be something small and realistic that can be easily integrated into your daily life. Again, we are creatures of routines. If a larger habit is attempted, it can get in the way of what we usually do. If it gets in the way too much then we can potentially end the habit of change. It would be unrealistic for someone who is stationary for work and home to add in a routine of working out six days a week for two hours at a time by themselves. The goal should be something that won’t get in the way of your usual routine. Instead of going straight to the gym, maybe consider walking around your home for fifteen minutes twice a week. The habit you are planning to do should be something small, realistic and achievable that aligns with your goal.
The second item is the potential obstacles that can get in the way of our routine. These come in the form of when you do the routine, what can potentially stop you engaging in your habit of change, and what may be necessary to complete it. If your routine includes eating healthier, maybe consider checking your home for what's available to eat. If your junk food such as chips and cookies are easier to access while your healthier options of apples and veggies are out of stock, then it is likely you will deviate to the available means. It would be necessary to have healthier choices to follow through with the habit of eating healthier. Another example would be if you are attempting to go to bed early. You know that your phone and other electronic devices are distractions. Consider putting the phone and other electronics down thirty-minutes to an hour before bed. Being on your phone can prevent you from sleeping. It’s one thing to know we can do our habits of change, it’s another to shine light on what we may do to self-sabotage ourselves.
Self Check-In
After defining the goals and reasons for a habit of change the next step is to consistently do them.Whether by yourself or someone else something will bar you from completing your habit of change. It can be discouraging, making it seem as though prior progress is meaningless. It may come in the form of frustration as you have consistently done your part with no immediate visible change. The feelings and discouragement are as true as the sky is blue. Here are some things to consider when this happens:
Remind yourself the reasons for doing it.
True change is slow and making habits of change are the same.
Remind yourself of your own values and prestige.
If it is not working, it may be time to re-evaluate the habit.
Remember the goal setting we did in the beginning, listing the reasons why we are going through these changes. It can be difficult at times to remind ourselves why we are doing what we are doing. Making a change for ourselves takes time. It can be difficult to continue doing our habit of change when we pass the timeline we made for ourselves or we start to feel the frustration of not seeing “the results.” Trust in yourself and trust the reasons why you wanted to make the changes. Give yourself the credit of attempting new things. Remind yourself how far you have gotten. There can come a point when you feel the current habit is not showing any benefits or may not have been needed for your goal. At that point, you can re-evaluate what helped and not worked as you refine your goal and future habits of change.
Roubicek & Thacker Counseling is Fresno’s premier provider of individual, couples, family, and group therapy. We offer in-person and online remote therapy sessions. Contact us today to change the way you feel.